Zouk
SMU Bondue Fright Night
SMU Bondue Camp
Had a long day at school and because of my overflowing and never ending school work & assignments, I am home on a Friday night. But its ok, I don't feel sorry for myself that I am not out there having fun because right now, there are so many things on my mind. Firstly, with every passing day, I hate school even more that I keep thinking of quitting school. But I know I can't do so because where can I go and what can I do after that? Its wearing me out, draining all the energy within me. Then there are so many things that I am trying to juggle at the same time as well. So when all that's left to keep me going is xxxxx, I saw things that I wished I didn't see or didn't know. I know I shouldn't be doubtful right, that words are just words and they do not mean anything. Like they can just be a passing remark but those words hurt too. How do you learn to trust someone who says one thing but might mean another. Someone who means so much to you and you to that person so as you thought, to realize that it might not be so after all. That everything might just be a lie and soon enough you crumble and fall into pieces. I went through it once and I vowed never to wanna go through something like that again. As I begin to take 2 steps forward instead of none, I tripped and now I am running back to where I started from. I really wanna believe with all my heart that those words don't mean anything. But a leopard never changes it spots right, like how do they go from being a carnivore to a herbivore??? It never happens and will never happen. Or maybe I should be the one who should stop deceiving myself.
This is so exhausting; I wish I could have just one day to strip myself off all worries. Maybe a week will be better. Isn't it awesome if you could just lose your memory for awhile and not remember anything. Sigh. I still have so much of work to do so I guess I will be staying up late tonight and not forgetting I have school the whole day tomorrow. It's really tragic! I just hope to meet the best friends for dinner tmr night, I am even striking Zouk out from the list. Alright gtg MUG.
